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Lirik Lagu Larry the Cable Guy – Fruitcake Commentary
By: Admin | Artist: L larry the cable guy | Published: 2024-02-07T12:03:13:00+07:00
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what the h~ll is this? russia?
what kind of moron would still give a fruitcake for christmas? good lord, you can’t eat the d~mn things. good lord, an ethiopian would look at a fruitcake and say, ‘ugh, gross! i’m going back to eating bugs and monkey brains.’ fruitcakes
tell you what, when i was a kid, we had to put two of ’em underneath the right~front wheel of the trailer to keep the living room sitting level
a lot of people don’t know, but did you know this? the fruitcake was also the main weapon used by texicans in the alamo? a lot of people don’t know that
fruitcakes first come to this country by a feller named jedediah herrington. he used ’em as fruit l!cks for his horses. a neighbor did him wrong one day, so to get even he sent him a fruit l!ck
throughout the years, the fruitcake has been used as a last~minute gift or as a ‘you’re~kind~of~a~b~tthole’ gift. the ancient romans used to stone folks with fruitcakes and the fruitcake was used in the first steam engines as coal substitutes
~burp~ sorry, that was fruitcake
the fruitcake still today is being used by african pygmies to lengthen their wieners. it’s true, now! you listen! they tie the fruitcake to their ding~dongs and stretch it so that they look good for the annual march through town for hunting season. that’s true! for years, h0m~s used the same technique to get ready for g~y parades, until they stopped when the pineapple started causing rashes
so the story of the fruitcake is a good one. so if you get one for christmas, it’s either: 1. ’cause somebody’s mad at you, 2. you’re a b~tthole, or 3. you’re queer and you need to stretch your wiener
merry christmas! like bill clinton said to hillary after he got a fruitcake, quote, ‘i’ll be gone for an hour, stretching his wiener’, unquote
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